You may remember back when I wrote last, I asked for prayer on something. That was actually for a job interview that Jesse was waiting to hear back from. Well, thank you for the prayers. We definitely felt them, and as we prayed we asked for a clear "yes" or "no". We got the answer on Monday evening, and it was a no. So, as with any answer there has been some bittersweet moments. We are thankful for a clear answer, and the peace that comes with that though. It's also just nice to know that (unless something wild happens) we'll be in NC for another year. :)
We also have some exciting news on the adoption front! The night that I wrote that last post I had also written our caseworker for our Adoption Agency just to see how things were going. The next day she wrote me and said that she was going to call me that afternoon. Being the realist (or pessimist at times...) that I am, I assumed the worst. You know, I thought that something had come up and we weren't on the active list or something....BUT to my surprise when she called she didn't say that. This is how the conversation went.
"Juli, are you sitting down?"
"Yes." (still feeling unsettled.)
"I need you to guard your heart."
"ok" (confused but getting excited.)
"A birth mother has chosen you and Jesse, and the baby boy is due March 17th!"
I can't really remember the rest of the conversation but I made a phone call to Jesse to talk and then to the birth mother's caseworker before accepting the match. Since this isn't the birth mother's first child they were confident that he would be early, as early as two weeks early. But seeing as I'm still at home writing this, you can tell he hasn't made his appearance quite yet. ;)
There are so many emotions that have been rushing through our hearts and minds these last couple of weeks. (We were matched on 2/25) Lots of excitement. Lots of what ifs. Lots of preparations. Lots of baby gear. Lots of prayers. Lots of sweet moments soaking up our last few days as a family of two. Lots of outpouring of love from our family, friends and church family. Lots of grace extended from our employers and the fact that we will get the call to leave at any moment.
There are a lot of unknowns, and that's part of why we hadn't shared this news yet. The birth mother has 10 days to change her mind after the baby is born. So, at this point it isn't a for sure yet. Nothing is definite. We could opt to stay here until those 10 days are up, but we don't want to possibly miss a day of our baby's life. So we are going to go down as soon as we get the call, pick up our baby and love on him as long as the Lord allows. It's a risk, but either this baby is meant to be ours or we will meet a special little guy who we will know only for a few days before returning him to his birth mother. Either way, we're confident that God has this all under control and in His plan. But of course, we're hoping this child is ours.
We're very excited, yet guarded still. We can't wait to become parents to the child God has for us. You're probably wondering about names. Well, we have two in mind but want to see him first before we name him--in case he doesn't look like _________________. :)
One of the girls I work with gave this to us for Christmas and I just love seeing it. (It's currently in our living room, but will soon be in the nursery that is shaping up nicely!)
Thanks for praying with us and coming along side us on this up and down journey of our adoption and life! We love you! The next time we update, we just may be parents! :)
Prayer requests for:
-The Birth Mother.
-The caseworkers at Open Door.
-Our marriage to grow closer to God and each other.
-Others we come into contact with, throughout this process.